(Not so) BREAKING NEWS: WMDs were in America all along!
Clyde [stares steadily into camera and holds index finger to ear]: That's right leech. I'm stood outside the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory right now where inside lies lots and lots of weapon-grade plutonium. The Bush administration recently revealed plans to dismantle their nuclear weapons dating back from the Cold War era, but replace them with newer, bigger and better ones! In fact, by the year 2022, America aims to produce 125 new and updated nuclear bombs per year! In addition to the humiliating hipocrisy, the Administration's recent proposal to India effectively allows it to bypass the nuclear non-proliferation treaty. Do you hear that...? It's the sound of America's policy on Iran disappearing up its own asshole.
"THE Bush Administration has revealed a blueprint for rebuilding America's decrepit nuclear weapons complex, including restoration of a large-scale bomb manufacturing capacity.
The plan calls for the most sweeping realignment and modernisation of the nation's massive system of laboratories and factories for nuclear bombs since the end of the Cold War.
Until now, the nation has depended on carefully maintaining ageing bombs produced during the Cold War arms race, some several decades old. The Administration, however, wants the capability to turn out 125 new nuclear bombs a year by 2022, as the Pentagon retires older bombs that it says will no longer be reliable or safe."
America should hold talks with itself. Then it should impose sanctions on itself. Then it should bomb the shit out of itself. The only difference this time is that I guarantee you will find your WMDs.